Larely, CA – The world of rock and roll collided with the city of Larely today when rock icon Jon Bon Jovi received a citation from the Larely Police Department for carrying a loaded six string, which was turned up following a search off his tour bus.
Outside the Tasty Freeze, Heartland, USA – In a depressing sign of just how bad the economy has gotten, John Mellencamp announced today that these current economic times are just too depressing for even him to sing about.
After nearly 25 years of painstaking research and development, a UC-Larely Chemistry Professor has finally perfected a new drug for Huey Lewis. The professor, Dr. Charles Osborne hailed the finding as “realizing his life’s dream”.
Hell, Hell – Residents of Hell awoke this past Sunday morning to find that temperatures had plummeted and frost and ice had permeated the land. According to meteorologists, it was the first time in all of eternity that Hell had actually frozen over. In fact, the low temperature of 32º F (0º C) was the [...]
After years of adamant denials to the contrary, Warrant lead singer Jani Lane finally admitted today that their hit song “Cherry Pie”, was actually about cherry pie.
