Wikipedia Issues Formal Apology for Not Having “Cal Jammer” Entry

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By • Jul 23rd, 2009 • Section: World

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St. Petersburg, FL – Wikipedia founder Jimmy Wales made a very heartfelt public apology today when it was discovered that the site does not have an entry for the late Cal Jammer, a male porn star who has over 300 adult films to his name.

Unwilling to deflect blame to anyone one other than his own company, Wales told reporters, “First and foremost, we are very sorry. To be honest, I’m not quite sure how this happened. We’ve got nearly three million articles in English on our site, and I guess I just assumed one of those had to be for Cal. Had I known there was no entry for him, I’d have made it myself, because let’s face it, we’re all fans of his. His work in ‘Anal Intruder 4’ is legendary and it saddens me to think that any Cal Jammer enthusiasts who came to Wikipedia looking to learn more about Cal were unable to do so.

Wales also reiterated that the absence of an entry about Cal has nothing to do with any sort of censorship, saying, “That is 100% not the case. We’ve got entries for guys like Ron Jeremy, Randy West, Tom Byron, and Don Fernando, and frankly, we’re quite proud of the depth of our adult film star content. Cal’s omission is the result of an oversight on our part, nothing else.”

Even more disappointing about there being no entry for Cal is the fact that his life should serve as a cautionary tale for anyone looking to enter the adult film business. Cal entered the business in 1989, and not only did he lay pipe, he was also a well regarded set builder and decorator. Before long he was at the top of the business and living the good life. He had a condo, boat, jetskis, and a bank account that, much like his cock, was bulging. He was even married to fellow adult film star Jill Kelly.

However, Cal’s world started to crumble in the mid 1990’s. Jill left him over his repeated off-camera infidelities, he was being audited by the IRS, and worst of all he began to have problems attaining and maintaining his erection, a death knell for male porn stars in the pre-viagra days. The ride came to a screeching halt on January 25, 1995, when an extremely agitated Cal drove over to his ex-wife’s house and shot himself in her driveway. He was 34.

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12 Responses »

  1. Cal Jammer was an attractive man who obviously had many issues that in his life couldn’t be resolved any other way than killing himself..

  2. Cal had a small johnson, and even then he couldn’t keep it up – meh, good riddance.

  3. I’m the hedgehog!! Cal was teh Walrus… googoocachoo

  4. jill….that’s so mean. Maybe it wasn’t that his johnson was small, but that your twat was huge. Buy yourself a baseball bat.

  5. Cal was a true woodsman and will be missed.

    Jill, you’re a loathsome whore!

  6. Agggg fuck cal man, dumb ass shoots himself over a whore. Who the fuck cares? Dumb cunt

  7. Funny, there is still no entry for Cal on wikipedia.

  8. Hahahaha….true that Brady Gaga. This article was written in July 2009. Its now December 2012 and there is still no wiki entry for him lmao. Google led me here lol

  9. Pretty sure the quote (at least some of it) from Jimmy Wales is fake. Anyone that believes that Wales is going to publicly say that “His work in ‘Anal Intruder 4’ is legendary” is deluded. Plus, there’s no reason for Wales to apologize for the absence of a Wikipedia entry about this dude or anyone else. If it’s not there, someone can create it (which still hasn’t been done!). Not having one still doesn’t require an apology because it’s a fucking Wikipedia entry – not a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame or a place in the Oscar Award “In Memoriam” video.

  10. I guess people don’t recognise satire anymore.This saddens me.

  11. Jill, You can take two hands in your pussy! John Homes is small penis for you!

  12. Whate movie did jill take 2 hands

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