Larely School District Passes “No Child Out in Front Act”
Larely, CA – The city of Larely took a big step toward improving its school system today when it was announced that beginning next year, all public schools will need to act in accordance with the “No Child Out in Front Act”.
The legislation, which was co-authored by Larely Mayor Vern Bixler and Superintendent Edgar Durow, aims to drastically limit the number of kids who require “special attention” from teachers because they are so much more advanced than their classmates. It also aims to close the “over-achievement gap” that has found gifted and talented students moving even further ahead of their other classmates over the past fifteen years.
“Every year we lose millions of dollars hiring support staff that works solely with our gifted and talented students.” Durow said, “So, in order to save this money and reallocate it to areas which will benefit all students, we’ve made it our goal to get these ‘front running’ students to come back and join the rest of the pack. As the Larely School District’s Motto says: ‘Kids can stand tallest under the middle of the bell curve.’”
As part of the act, standardized testing will be used to measure students’ progress annually in grades three through eight. The data from these tests will then be used to measure the school’s Adequate Yearly Progress (AYP). If a school fails to meet the AYP set for them, it will be forced to either send the students to a school that has met its goal, or provide the students with tutors that can bring them back to the level of their classmates. Schools that don’t meet their AYP requirement will also be subject to decreased funding.
Mayor Bixler hailed the decision saying, “We’ve finally implemented a program that requires Larely’s schools to increase their standard of accountability when it comes to gifted students. Year after year, teachers have been getting away with pushing some of their more gifted students even further in front of the pack. What they don’t realize is that doing this tends to cause more harm than good. Advanced students are subject to teasing, and frankly, begin to develop a ‘my shit don’t stink’ attitude when it comes to life. This isn’t what I want from our schools.”
Bixler also went on to add, “We’re trying to develop students who realize that in life, it’s ‘Mo’ Savvy, Mo’ Problems’, which coincidentally is our secondary motto.”
Wow, that’s almost as good as every child left behind.