Strip Club Modifies Fire Sprinkler to Rain Down $1 Bills
Larely, CA – Smokin’ Poles, one of Larely’s many strip clubs, announced today that they have modified their fire sprinkler that sits above “Sniffers’ Row” so that it will now rain down $1 bills.
The move comes in response to the surge in popularity of “makin’ it rain”, a process in which a strip club patron throws a stack of money in the air above the strippers to give the effect that it’s raining money.
The modification, which was made using a newly fabricated sprinkler head and an old pneumatic tubing system from a bank, holds up to 10,000 dollar bills and can be adjusted to drop 50, 100, or 200 bills a second. It will be free for patrons to use when they pony up the necessary cash.
According to the club’s owner, Roger Frost, makin’ it rain, an act previously only attempted by true balers with true stacks, has gotten so popular that every Tom, Dick, and Harry in the club wants to try it. “Unfortunately, most non-ballers don’t know how to do it properly.” he said. “Makin’ it rain correctly requires the stack of bills to come apart in mid-air and gently cascade downward, going all around the stripper. Not doing it properly can have disastrous consequences. I once had a dancer become injured when a stack of $1,000 in singles failed to come apart in the air and hit her in the eye. I had to pay her Workman’s Comp for a month until she got the eye patch off. As a result, I felt a change needed to be made.”
Frost mulled over thousands of different options over the course of six months. When he had some difficulties finding the perfect solution, he decided to enlist some expert help. “I talked to some of the guys from the pipe fitters union [not to be confused with the local 420 Pipe Hitters Union] that eat lunch here every single day about what kind of modifications I’d need to make to allow the sprinkler head to accommodate hundreds of bills flowing through it every second. They gave me some valuable advice and drew up some solutions. I took those drawings over to a parts fabricator and had him make up the new sprinkler head. After that, I just bought a pneumatic tubing system from a local bank that had gone out of business and my machine was done. I call it the “Rain Maker 10,000”.
Frost has also applied for a patent on the machine and expects to hear back this week from the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office regarding its status. Frost is confident he’s sitting on a huge money-maker. “There isn’t a gentlemen’s club in this country that wouldn’t want one of these, and I intend to give it to them.”
