Critics Suspect Cabela’s Secretly Financing Movie “Brotherhood of the Traveling Shpants”
Hollywood, CA – As more plot details continue to be leaked from the set of the movie “The Brotherhoold of the Traveling Shpants”, many critics are starting to suspect the movie is being secretly funded and produced by giant outdoor outfitter company Cabela’s.
Suspicions first arose when the movie’s synopsis was revealed to be: “A group of four best friends go to a thrift store and find a pair of sturdy, pigment-dyed, garment-washed 6-ounce 100% cotton shpants that fit them all perfectly. The foursome soon discovers that they each encounter good fortune while wearing these ingenious pants that features on each leg, hidden under a flap, a zipper that lets you detach the pant legs when things begin to heat up.” Coincidentally, this description is almost exactly the same as the shpants made and sold by Cabela’s.
The movie, which is slated for release in Fall 2009 and stars Shia LeBouf, Chace Crawford, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and Clint Howard as the group of four best friends, came out of total anonymity to become one of the most sought after scripts in Hollywood.
Further digging into its writer revealed that the script isn’t the property of one single writer, but rather an obscure writers commune based in Sidney, NE named The Salebac House. Even stranger, a quick web search for “Salebac House Writers Commune” yields only one result, a geocities page that simply says: “The Salebac House Writers Commune: The World’s Foremost Outfitter of Movie Scripts”.
Calls to Cabela’s corporate office, also in Sidney, NE went unreturned, but, Brett Ratner, the movie’s director, dismissed such speculation as “entirely false”. He also added that the mere idea Cabela’s involvement in the movie “takes away from my artistic integrity that I’ve spent years building and developing.” Ratner promptly stormed off, but stopped after only a few steps and said, “The movie is sure to be a huge success once audiences realize that the shpants also have plenty of pocket space, including two big bellows cargo pockets; two zippered rear pockets; a front button-flap utility pocket; a button-flap knife or pliers pocket on the right side.” He took two more steps and follwed, “and if that’s not enough to get you into the theater, perhaps, their button-adjustable tabs on the waist, interior flap to prevent leg zippers from touching your leg, two-button waist, wide- tunnel belt loops and the fact that they’re machine washable will get you there.”
